Live From New York

First post, a new blog, possibly a new life....

An Introduction

Many years ago, when I was still a teenager, I began to dream of a life living abroad. These dreams came from a variety of sources - growing up in New York City, a place where everyone is from somewhere else - being surrounded by other languages - and falling into a group of friends who went to the United Nations International School. Most of these kids had lived in other countries and spoke multiple languages. I grew up in The Bronx, city kid through and through. I thought I had seen a lot. But at some moment it began to dawn on me that I hadn't seen as much simply by living in a city. An idea began to blossom in me that New York City - while being home to a multitude of languages, cultures, foods - was just the tip of the ice burg. People streamed to New York City from all over the world, and yet I, wanted to leave.

I decided that my ultimate dream would be to live in Spain.

Fast forward some years:

I am 29 years old, living in Burlington, Vermont. I have a Master's Degree in Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages (MA TESOL - wow talk about an anagram!). I apply and accept a job to teach at a university in Kanazawa, Japan. This opportunity was too great to turn down. I had never really imagined myself in Japan, but I packed my bags, said my goodbyes and got on the airplane. I remember so very clearly being driven from the airport to the hotel I would stay in for a few days in suburban Kanazawa. I looked out at the green, lush, rice fields, the billboards that I couldn't begin to decipher, breathed in the muggy air, tried to identify the deafening buzzing in the air (Cicadas, I later learned... we didn't have those in The Bronx.), and I thought to myself: What the hell am I doing??? Where am I and when can I leave?

I daresay by the time I accepted Japan and began to enjoy Japan, I decided it was time to leave.


Which brings us to now:

I am 32 years old. I am not married. My boyfriend, who I've known for 10 years now, is Spanish. (This is a story I'll write about in the future). I don't speak Japanese. I don't speak Spanish. I leave tomorrow to begin a new life in Madrid, Spain. After leaving Japan, I did attempt to live in Madrid. I was there for 3 months this past summer. I took an intensive Spanish course, got a few hours of teaching, but was homesick. I couldn't believe that after living in Japan, I was having such a hard time of it in Spain - a country I have felt such warmth for for so long.

Perhaps I didn't give myself enough time in between ending one life and beginning a new one. Perhaps I was shocked to find myself so dependent on my boyfriend after being so very independent. And perhaps, I was simply homesick and missed being somewhere where everything was comfortable and easy.

I flew back home. I have now been in New York for a month. Most of this month was spent feeling pretty sorry for myself and super confused. To stay in America or return to Spain was the question. I was hoping I'd get a job here that I couldn't turn down and so the choice would be made for me, but no. That was not meant to be.

I went to Vermont. I went to a few yoga classes. I walked and talked with my girlfriends. I played with some babies. I almost moved into a gorgeous sublet in Winooski, VT. I didn't.

After emailing the schools I worked for over the summer, telling them that I didn't know when I was coming back to Madrid and to give my classes to other people, I felt a horrible sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. A poorly payed job in Burlington didn't pan out.

Now what? I decided to look for schools in Madrid. I registered for an Intensive Spanish class. I emailed the schools, acknowledging that they probably already had filled their classes, but now I know when I'm returning. Within 24 hours, both schools responded favorably with offers of classes. One of my boyfriend's roommates decided to move out in perfect time for me to move in to the apartment.

I am amazed that after going back and forth and being so very confused, feeling as if I were going crazy, that once I made a decision, all pieces fell into place.

And so - after a long introduction, dear reader, this blog will be a place for me to document my life as nomadic homebody.

As I used to sign off from my quiz containing emails in Japan: Comments and suggestions are always welcome.